Frankly, the reason it has been so long since my last post is because I’m disappointed in you, readers, and I’ve been counting to ten (one number every 2.5 days) to avoid posting in anger. In my last post about darling childhood stuffed toys, I made an innocent comment (accompanied by an innocuous photograph) about how funny it looked when I had only part of the second elephant finished. Some of you, inexplicably prompted by my clinical, non-titillating description of a sensitive surgical procedure, assumed all sorts of appalling things about illicit and tawdry acts that were, in your polluted minds, being committed in the picture. That was never my intention, and I hope you’re ashamed of yourselves. This is a family blog. In that my family reads it, so please, don’t embarrass me again.
Forgiving and forgetting. I have amassed a lot of random blogging material in the past few weeks, so let’s not waste any more time getting right down to the important work of linking those topics with non-sequitors. First, I’d like to bestow the inaugural Lickety Knit Open-Minded Business Award on Jo-Ann Fabrics and Crafts for its wholly enlightened Valentine’s Day flier:
Please take a look at the scene playing out here. At first glance you might think the boy on the right is bringing a flower to the girl to demonstrate his blossoming affection for her, but that would be unforgivably hetero-assumptive of you. A closer look reveals something quite different: the boy with the flower and the boy on the left are clearly locking eyes, with the boy on the right obviously angling his head to see past the girl (who, by the way, is in for a rude and probably very confusing surprise). The boy on the left is giddy and nervous and overjoyed that he is not the only one who has these kinds of “different” feelings. The girl is clueless and, frankly, incidental to all this. Congratulations, Jo-Ann Fabrics, on your demonstrated commitment to challenging society’s assumptions about romantic love!
Moving on. Last month marked the thirtieth anniversary of my birth. It was celebrated without a significant amount of fanfare except for two things: a) an off-season getaway to Cape Cod, where our amazing B&B room had, among other amenities, a spinning wheel in front of the fireplace, and b) yarn! In the mail! From Laura!
Laura truly honors me with this gift, because I believe it marked the first time in her knitting life that she bought yarn that wasn’t predominantly pink. In fact, when I first received it and the label was covering the pink bit, I wondered if I could possibly be thinking of the wrong Laura. Everything clicked into place once I removed the label, however, and I am a big fan of this colorway. The muted blues and browns are very much to my taste, and the hint of pink will always remind me of the kindness and generosity and single-minded color obsession of one of my first and favorite blog friends. Thank you, Laura!
The past month featured not only gift-receiving, but gift-giving. Some of you may recall that back in the early fall I made a hat for my sister-in-law (Rachel Sr.), knit to her exact specifications. Like any appreciative and well-adjusted adult, Rachel immediately declared it both the best hat and the best friend she’d ever had, and since then she has taken it with her everywhere. And I really do mean everywhere; as just one example, the hat managed to make it into in just about every single photograph taken of anyone or anything this past Thanksgiving.
In fact, over the course of that particular hat-filled family gathering, it started to become clear to me that perhaps equivalent hats for the rest of the family might be well received. My hunch was correct:
The only problem is that, as I suspected might happen, I improved upon my improvised pattern on each subsequent hat. Each hat has a bright contrast lining knit with Knitpicks Crayon (making it extra warm and extra soft), and I got better at concealing this lining to the proper degree. I also began holding the yarn double for the ribbing, and I made the ribbing quite a bit taller, resulting in a warmer and better-fitting brim. Additionally, I made slight aesthetic adjustments to the position of the stripe. I know, that sounds like an awful lot of fine-tuning for such a straight-forward hat, but believe me, it’s the little things that make the difference. All in all, the last hat I knit was significantly better than the first, thus making my very special custom-knit hat for Rachel Sr. rather a bit pitiful by comparison. I think I owe her a do-over.
(Side note: It was only a leeeettle awkward that shortly after I presented these hats to my in-laws, Matt’s uncle tragically passed away and the whole family gathered for the funeral. I’m not sure the immediate family of the deceased knew quite what to make of the fact that their cousins were all wearing coordinating hats at the grave site.)
(Other side note: You may notice the glaring omission of Matt from the band of hat wearers. All along he said he just didn’t want one. He won’t admit it, but his resolve was breaking by the end. I know he can’t hold out forever.)
If it’s not clear already, I’ll be very explicit: I have really great in-laws. As just one example of their greatness, when they asked me what I wanted for Christmakah this year and I said, “Socks That Rock mediumweight in Farmhouse and Watermelon Tourmaline,” they didn’t say, “You want what what in what and what?” No, they simply shrugged and obliged. You see, I had adored Ashley‘s chevron scarf in that very color combination (I know, me and the rest of the known universe) when I’d seen it in person last year, and I’d been dreaming of having one for my very own.
It turns out, sadly, that this color combination, while glorious and certainly to be admired on others, is just not for me. I simply can’t see myself wearing it. I want to be the kind of girl who wears bright and vivid colors, but I am in fact the kind of girl who wears colors that look like they were dyed solely with different varieties of dirt.
Therefore, I am offering this yarn up for trade. I will send it either unraveled and rewound, or with the partial scarf still intact (about 19 inches unblocked). I’d like to get a single skein of Socks that Rock in exchange, but I’ll entertain other offers. Just send me an email (rachel at licketyknit dot com) or leave a comment. (In-laws: Remember when I said you were so great? I hope that extends to not being super pissed off that I am parting ways with the generous Christmakah gift you got me.)
Next time: a very small sweater and a well-dressed turtle.